Look at me for once, the one that onced love you. Remember, that you use to look me in the eyes and stare me with your sexy eyes. I use to whisper to you, 'I love you baby'. You would bully me, whenever I'm with you. I miss the old times, old you and the old days. Don't you think so? When are you gonna call me bi again? No matter how cruel or wrong my actions were, I'm willing to do anything just to have you. The rights and wrong I've done, No matter how people judged, I didn't look or take notice, but all I know is that all I did it is all because of love. Damn, I miss you MelvinTan.  

If he think his free to have r/s, there's no escape possible. So why do you have to bring those shit medicines to school and everywhere? Phobia is worse than that, Rebecca. A man with one watch knows what time it is, A man with two watches is never sure. So what's the point of suffering this shit? Live life. :D Remember this, 'When the students ready, the master appears.' Special thnks to Babytummy and guys, I'm living a happy life. :b Don't worry so much k honey hunneh! Hehe.

So, hi there. (Wave)(Insertcuteface) Hiek2. Well.. lemme see I guess I will rot today at home In facts, No. Went out with Qianhui to Hpoint. Keke. Have a h2h tgt, though I'm sucks at cheering people, but at least I feel proud that actually she feels much better. :D How's great. I think I'm changing phone and number, to start a brand new day. Rebecca remember this, you're not alone, you're with your family, friends and ME. I'm the one who need to learnt this lesson. I'm the one who need to walk this path myself. Life is all about game, to win or to lose. You must know how to handle, your game is life and love. I guess, our love it's not true love, it's lust. What more can I say? It has been two weeks, since you left me, I'm havin a good life, flirting around with hot guys, fb/msn/msg. What about you? Sniffing glue? :) Having sex with some other girl? Or...? I don't know, I can't guess. I love you, that's why I have to let you go. It's me, I wanted it too. I have to change, to show you without you I'm strong still. It's time, I guess? Goodluck baby. If, we are meant to be together, we will, perhaps someday.
 也许放手是一种为对方的付出，对对方的重视 也是一种无奈 虽然很想把对方留在身边，可是对方的笑容与幸福却胜于自己的一切 ，为了对方，可以不惜一切地为对方付出，甚至是离开。

Well.. Everything is over. Holiday now. (insertsmileyface) And you know the rest.. Well.. maybe I honestly don't really understand. Dear Melvin, I'm grateful enough that I came across to walk this path with you in the past, I realised you're doing so much better than me. And you don't need me. I guess we'll never be together again, as you never gave us to do so. As what Zech said, learn to be strong, you can't be there with me 24/7 everyday.  Time will heal all wound. Everyone makes mistake, mistake are for me to learn, learn and not to repeat same mistake again. Sooner or later, I have to face you. God gave me a chance when you broke up with me, it's my choice for wanting you back. God already helped me. There's no way, there's gonna be second time. Revenge are just being childish. Let nature take it course. :) Hiek2.


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Pictures are all in facebook!
Penisular > RaffleSpc > Bugis > Iluma > Dg > Mall > 4hundredplus > Point > Hsh !

Hi earthling. Sup. Didn't went out today, it's raining all I can see. Went to Rivermall with Babysabby and BabyTummy yesterday. MUHAHA, daiso.~ Aftermaths, Zech's condo, point, block ad hsh. :-) Wow, I'm willing to change for the better, I promise you I won't sniff glue already k, even though it hurts alot. Naise. Catch the ball? :b Okay, this few days was so busy with some talks that was given by our school dm. School selected 10pupils for attending this course, and for that, that included me. It's a must for attending this, people enjoying their holiday, yet I have to attend this course, greenleaf thingy. God. Singapore Customs yesterday came to our school for a talk bout smoking illegal cigarettes. I'm only one who got caught for illegal cigarettes. Illegal cigarettes is made of shit. I just realise. Hahahahahaha! And the day before yesterday, went to Lor Ah Soo, for talks again. It's like, you can't even enjoy your holiday. We've camp during holiday too. Argh. Ohyes, report book, I was happy about my result. Actually, teacher gave me a chance for promoting NA, but i choose NT. And you, remember our bet? :) You said, when I get promoted you listen every word I said. And, I promise you I will throw my result slip on your face. I guess, you don't remember already. It's fawsome amazing how I get to know you. Why? Because that's the reason why. Where to begin?  That's it. There's even no explanation. There was no more, no less. You told me that this matter is bout you, you wouldn't tell. The facts, is you're lying, LYING. You're just finding an excuse to break with me, and clingy with other girl. I had nothing to do with it, how could I not have everything to do with it. You just want to be single, you don't want me. You don't want us. But we were perfect. I can't get over you, I miss you. My heart breaks every time I think about you. I dream about you, just to wake up to realize you're gone. I dream about  how we make things up so fast together. I dream about the first day we're having our cute version at your house. You told me I'm the one you love the most, you told me that you would treasure me. But I realise, its only just a dream.. I still love you. Why did you have to absolutely destroy me. Why? 5months to you not memorable enough? Everytime we pass by a place that we went together, did together reminds me alot of thing. Yes, you said a good horse would never turn back. You're good enough? If you're good enough you wouldn't broke up with me, you told me you're just kidding when you sent that. But why when Sabrina scold you it became real? I'm really foolish enough to believe your lies, why? Why have you do this? I did say, I deleted our pictures already, yes I want you forget me. But I was just saying, not even one I deleted it. We fought for the past 2months I was with him through everything when he failed. You loved me too much to destroy it for yourself. He loved me too much to disappoint me. And that 's what made him extraordinary to me after a while, after I realized he wasn't ideal at all. And forgave him again and again for what he was doing to himself and to us because that's what love is, that's what love does. I lowered my standards for you. To love you. To be with you. And you made me just another piece of trash. Just an out of town snack where you could store up all your emotions and get all the love one person can give to another person because I did, I actually did. I actually gave all of myself. I sacrificed part of who I am for you and that never comes back. I never get that back. And why? Because you loved nothing..

The thing that you want, I can't gave you. I gave the thing I want, is not what you want. We're not suitable, we won't admit, many times we cry together, hug together wanna explain but this is just a start, don't wanna cry, don't wanna be upset. Heard that you're happy, I feel proud of you. But I can't be with you by your side. Everything had just over this is it I don't wanna be sad. In future I believe our times will come again . 8days already, I really need you. Many things happened, there's so much things to tell you, I really wish you would be there for me, that's really impossible. I just wanna be a happy girl..

Stop picking on me, you bias! Wow, finally I saw your true colours. Seems like, someone got a new girl eh. Hehe. I'm not perfect, so are you. :) Keke, just live your happily ever after. Once bitten, twice shy. Thrice fuck off from my life. Maybe, I'm the dumb one who gave you chance & you don't appreciate it. Well, tits for tat. I won't be dumb this time round sexy. I will just relax and enjoy the show. Very interesting, I LIKE. OH & NOT FORGETTING POPCORNS!!!! Time will prove everything. This is my blog, my say. It belongs to me. So, stfu. Hehehehehe. Don't like it, jolly well stick a bamboo stick up your ass!! Don't waste your fucking precious time reading it. MUHAHAHA. Last long dude. To think that I am  foolish and naive to believe you that you would actually marry me & have kids with me LOL! 

When I think about you not being here with me (I actually think about you all the time), it makes me sick to my stomach. I miss you so much it physically hurts. Whenever I talk about you, I feel a knot in my throat. I can't picture myself with anyone but you. And time goes by and does it's cray thing but, how I feel doesn't change, it never goes away, even when I hate you for leaving me, for not loving me enough, it doesn't  works. How I cried myself to sleep wishing I could feel you close to me one more time. How I wish I could just stop feeling because it hurts so much. I'm in hell.

Mall-SeragoonKtv-CompassPoint-HougangPoint-9hundredplus-hsh. :) BbieLiwen, thanks for being my great listening ear, shall meet up again!:) Hehehe.

I think I may have lost that one person.That you want to hate but you can't because despite all the pain you love them so much. Hate is not an option. I still love you I fear I always will. I know it is mostly my fault for resisting you and putting up a barrier. Something I created out of knowing that you could break my heart in a moment. I think I may have lost you. And I just want you to know I am sorry.I just wish you could see how much I love you. And I hate myself for not showing it to you more. And now I have learned too late that barriers don't protect me they just hurt you. And that breaks my heart more then anything. I loved you right away because you saw through me and did not care how hard I made it. You were cute. I love you with all my heart and I hope you can somehow forgive me for pushing you away. You made me delicate and I wake up crying thinking of how far you are. I am sorry for playing hard to get after the games were over. 5days already.. My mind is all over you.

Can you tell me that you love me again?

So many people dislike fairytales because it makes us believe in love, believe that a prince will swoop down and save us when something goes wrong. But I’ve come to realise that in every fairytale-like movie, every girl took a risk. Took a risk for love, took a risk in the name of love. I hate what you’re doing to me. And then I remind myself that you’re becoming a completely different person. And maybe, once you fully develop into your old you, because he’s not the real you. We’ve had our ups and down. I’ve convinced myself I hated you, I’ve convinced myself you didn’t care about me. I’ve told all my friends that you are a big idiot. But I always let you right back in. It is like you are the only person who I’ve ever given a key to my heart. Please, stop what you’re doing to me. It hurts so badly. You said this to me, two months two days, one hundred and seventy three pictures, you said i never counted.. You said, if this time we patched I'll never let you out of my arms again. You say, you'll wait. When i was talking to you bout our future, you're thinking whether you could really change and when you looked me in the eyes, you told me you could. Why? Tell me. Are you taking me as substitution? A spare tire? Getting bored of me? Or.... you know yourself. You know by then, how much I love you. I learned that the first time you left me. However, when you came back after a long, i erased all of the memories and reminders of how awful you had been only to replace them with the hope that you were different, that you would be different and that you love me differently. What's that saying? How could I forget? When you left the second time around, i didn't know what to do with myself. I was broken, hopeless, hurt, cold, scared, depressed...i just wanted you back. I would spend my days just sitting in my room, thoughts running through my mind like a busy highway. I would just cry, and cry, and cry. But I know you might not want me back for all the terrible things I said or done. The things I said I wanted. I'm so selfish. I never cared about anyone except for myself. And you cared about me more than you cared about you. I wish I could say the same. I'm sorry. :(

It's wednesday! & of cuz, went out with Zech, sab, fiona, hazel, nat and ivan. :) They made my day. Went to mall with Fiona and mom then headed down to lil india. Vivo aftermaths, it was enjoyable! Dhoby afterwards, amk meet Tammy, mabel, lorenzo, elli and more. Hahahahaha! Pictures are all in facebook. :)
Hi, 2days already. How have you been? Having a new girlfriend now? Life without me feel great? Have you ate? Is your stomach having gastric pain? My life sucks, without receiving your text and etc. :( But.. friends are there to cheer me up! I always have a sinking feeling that are stuck inside my heart, my mind. It hurts alot, whenever i pass by a place or remember something that we did things together. Reminds about us. OH, MEMORIES. Whenever i saw words, that called love, i said this 'DOG' not love. Words just demand explanation. They require analysis. They are the construction and expression of my thoughts. Of my heart. But they can't describe it. They can't describe any of it. They can't tell you how deep the memories are, or how often I think of them. They can't scream what I really want to say. They are the mask of how I really feel and they try to disguise the pain, but someone will strip it away. And someone will make those words worthless. So what is a word worth? Nothing. What are three words worth? Nothing. But we say them anyway, because you know. You know, more than anyone what they mean. You know when I say I love you, I really mean that those three words can't describe what it is we have. When I say you're amazing, I know the word is just a cover, a quick way for me to remember all the things that amaze me about you, a mask for the memories we share, a disguised version of our adventures together. And I really believe that you know, when I say I miss you, it's not just that. I miss you every moment, and I miss just what your name means to me. It means an alphabet of sounds and letters and words. But none of them really mean anything, because words are based on trust, they rely on how truly and deeply we feel. Remember, always, that they don't mean anything, they are letters and they are constructions, but we deconstruct them every day and we twist them, we manipulate them so that they say what we want them to. But no word, no shape, no photograph could ever twist so far that it could begin to explain even a little bit of how I feel.

A brand new day, a brand new life.

Hi sexy. '.'
Today, it will be me last time touching glue, i won't disappoint you guys! :) And you. I'm won't be so foolish either. Basically, went out with Sab, tammy, mabel, fiona and ron. Aw, his dog was so fucking adorable. I swear, but beware of  his dog ate too much salt,*fake* his fur keep dropping. Hahahaha! I guess, her master gave her loads of salt. Okay, went to green today. Ate and then left to hougang ave 8, point and homesweethome about 10plus. So many things happen, i won't elaborate. Hehehehehehehe. My heart literally shattered into pieces at the moment you told you're not gonna do anything to save this relationship. And that you're just gonna sit back and let whatever happen, happens. 'If God want us to be together,we will'. But then again, if you love something, you should work for it. It's sad, because you left me hanging. You told me I'm a lousy girl and I never appreciate. You said I never made effort in maintaining this relationship. I told myself to give all up on you. But then again, I can't. Everyday, I feel so lost. And when our song started playing on iTunes, phone or on other people's phone the feeling I have towards you, it's there. Tears started shedding. Every night, I fall asleep in wet pillow. While you enjoy hanging out with your friends. You told me you were hurting too, but it doesn't seem like it. And I can't watch any sort of love, romance movies anymore. Because it hurts so badly. I was never those who cried during sad love stories, but now, I am. Whenever i see couples, hugging, kissing etc reminds me of you. You turned me into an emotionally weak person. You promised me forever. You said you were gonna marry me. You said I was the only you loved. You said you'll love me for as long as you can. I told you I don't believe in sweet talks. But, you made me believed everything you said. And then you tore me apart. You broke my heart. Completely. But I love you, and yet I shouldn't. You spoiled my whole perspective towards love. Do you know that? But well.... If i truly love him, let him go. If he doesn't come back, he is not meant for me. So.. time to let go? :) I was lost, so lost. Until then, my dearest friends was the one who are there for me when I'm down. I had fled there to find myself, and when I did I realized you guys never once lost me. Thank you for waiting, for guarding, for keeping. There's so many friends there for me. Yeah. Once bitten, twice shy. Happens one, happens twice won't be happening thrice. :-) Pictures are all in facebook! xoxo

I tried to get this relationship back but it's obviously not working. Crying doesn't slove the matter. People often say, '拿的起放的下,但是我放不下.' There's so much left unsaid that It's got to a point where I'm a mess. I can't keep trying. I won't lie, I still hope you'll call & probably won't move on properly till you do. I'm confused that you were just going to leave it though you know what I'm feeling. Despite what you have going on I'd support you not stress you. You say your life has a schedule, I could've worked with that all I wanted was your time, however much or little. I need you to know that I would've been different. No lies, control, cheating or games. Think of the time we spent together. You know we'd have been good for each other. You made me feel things I'd never felt before then took it away as if it was nothing. As if I was nothing. No explanation. Imagine how that feels. Being openly emotional isn't something I do so you know I'm really trying. What happens when she wants him back? But I already know the answer to that. Maybe one day he’ll love me. Maybe one day he won’t want her, won’t want me to be her. Maybe one day he’ll think I’m truly beautiful and look at me the way I look at him every time I see him. But then again, maybe one day I’ll get over him. Maybe one day I can look at him and say, “You’re so not worth this” and actually believe it. Maybe one day I’ll be able to think about someone else. But, I wish I can. *Rebecca Look* His dumping you, NO. I would be saying, "THANKS GOD HE'VE DUMP ME." I believe i can get over him. Hate is a strong words, so I replace love. You use to be a strong girl. But.. I don't know what's was your reason, I'm still here for you. If you felt everything you said you did you could balance it. But I can't force that. You have your reasons. I just wish you didn't. Either way, my feelings won't change.

Will you still need me, Will you still feed me, When I'm sixty-four?

Part 1.

Hi. Morninglovely. Going baby house awhile more, keke. Blogger upload, sucks. The pictures here, only half of it, should be 200plus. Nvm, the rest of the picture was at facebook. Take a look! :) Hehehehehehe. Guess what? Where did i go? Prawning. Here i come, Meet Sab and Tammy at point, then headed down to baby house. Yesterday, only spent few hours with baby, due to his lion dance. :-( Aw.. Afterwards, Ave  8 to eat, then Hougang park walk walk. Took bus 72, to Hougang mall, meet Ivan, Mayber and Melissa. Took bus to Block 437 to meet Wan.  HAHAH. Effing funny, Tammy was fucking shy.. I swear it's fucking cute.. Hahahahaha! Slack.. Mabel came.. Ivan left.. Took bus, to Compass. Waited for shuttle bus.. It's free anyway. I know, Singapore love free things. As i can see.. The bus bring us to Punggol end.. My whole body was sweating and sticky. But well.. fun though. Hehehe. We didn't caught any, there's one kind man who gave us their 5prawns. What a kind man.. Hahaha. And we caught 4prawns. The man at Counter gave us, more than 5prawns too.. And we bbq til 10plus.. Home sweet home. :)

Honey, 1day more? 

Lastly, Ginny.

I may not know you well.. I know you're Mabel's cousin.. I heard your name yesterday while she was mentioning your name while crying. She said you're a innocent and cheerful girl. She took the newspaper whenever she go. You bought many people laughter and joy especially your boyfriend. You just left the world    like this.. YOU'RE LIKE FOURTEEN ONLY, there's still far to go. I believe you're now watching over your    love ones. I have nothing to say, but R.I.P Ginny. :)

I want a kid, impossible.

We went out, we held hands, we fought, we kissed, we forgave, we stayed late, we talked, we cried, we laughed, we yelled, we met people, and everything in between. And even our cute version for 3times. And in that time, i fell in love with you. I fell so crazy, ridiculously in love with you. That's when i learnt that i couldn't let you go again. I had to keep you tight. I have you, not always, not as much as i want to, but you're mine. I'm not being dramatic or something.. Hahahahahahaha! 

I  don't care what anyone says. I have a problem trusting people in the past because I always think they're trying to take an advantage of me but when babies smile at me, you know they're just smiling at you because they're happy, they're innocent. Kids are so beautiful because they have no hate, no destine and no sin. 

I'm not perfect, but i will keep tryin.

Pregnant women aged 14-17 years are at higer risk of preterm birth and of having a child with low-birth-weight, especially if they are having their second child. I don't even know why i'm posting this.. Passerby, keep your comments to yourself. :-) Adore babies!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! But not the right time yet. :( Bbieboy. Heheheehehehehehehehehe. 

12 October 2010. :-)

Saw this date? Oh come on, oh come on. I love this date. C.u.t.e. l.i.l .v.e.r.s.i.o.n, baby you know i know. 6days more? WASZUP. 5th month anniversary soon, great! :-) Yah, hi. Lately, went to bbie's house. Okayok. Why underage girl can't have kids? Or pregnant? Why must have law in Sinapore? Why girl need to suffer the pain? Why girl must lost virgin? Why girl must have reputation? Why? I know the answer, simply because..... Police protect girls, from getting underage sex. A.R.G.H bullsh!t. IF, i have a chance of getting a kids, i would treasure it. Ya, readers will start thinking or saying all rubbish. But i'm saying the facts. Life there's one. Treasure it or that's it. The baby goes through alot of changes over the course of the nine months inside our uterus. Babies are just way too adorable!!! Hell god. Aw, school tomorro, abit of sucky. :( Baby fetching me tommorrow, hehehehehehehehehehehehe. (L) 

如何更强硬的生活,你有我,我强了。

Every year, this happens. I guess i will not be sleeping tonight, it's 101010, 1000pm. I'm going explore my brain... Sunday, i spent my day with baby. Watch horror movie at baby's house. Stupid, i was screaming like a mad women. Baby was laughing at me. :( Then headed down to Hougangmall to eat my lunch, aftermath CottonOn to meet baby's friend, 684 and lastly home sweet home.

10.10.10, 10.00pm. I love you. :-)
I miss my childhood. I miss being young again. How i wish, i could be a sleeping beauty. Now, i'm gonna have brainstorming. Yes. Let's rake up the past, since it's 10.10.10. Reminds me of the past. It's was extremely scary. Perfect secret to keep, my brain. This brain of mine, has been following me for 14years and counting.. We became stranger, friend and end up together. 2months passed, it's the worst nightmare i ever had. You hook up with other girl and leave me alone. We totally change when we're not togther. We make things clear and patch up. 4months of up and down. 8days more to our 5thmonth. Time really files. Having you by my side is wonderful. :-)

The key is happiness.

Memorizes? 

Friends change, Parent change, Boyfriend change, People change and Everything change. I now realise, that friends are always important to me than my boyfriend. When i need them, they are always there for me 24/7. Yes, it's totally true. Friends there's bad and good one. Bad one, who betray you. Good one, who are there with you when you need them. If you never knew, what is that new, it's you. It doesn't matter to me anyway. I just love the way you're. There are no mistakes. Everyone is not fully perfect. Life there's definitely up and there. Let me rock your life will you baby? :) 

Well, I'm being bored at home due to my fever, ew. Who love being stuck at home? No one. I miss baby. Hell godddd. I need money. I can't probably always ask mom for money. $$$.$$$ OR even baby. Obviously not. My tagboard so dead. :( Make it alife. K3k3. Baby exam is already started, jiayou, fully support here!!!!!! *muackmuack* Rotting at home, is lousy. :( I WOULD PREFER TO BE OUTSIDSE WITH BABY. 

Went to Watch movie at Tpy with baby and sean. End up left me and baby, took back bus 159 back to hougang. Holysh!t, my love to baby is getting deeper. HellYES. :* Bye readers!!!!!!