I'm not acting drama. I know you're not reading, but well I just wanted to let this feelings out to make me feel better. Those things you said bout me running thru my mind every night. Playing every night and morning. Somehow no matter how much I told myself to stop thinking bout it, I just can't control myself to think back all the memerioes once we had. But now.... On a daily basis we deal with bitches, backstabbers, lies, boyfriends, crushes, ex-es, appearance, insecurity and much more, we have so much to consider. You may not know when or where I checked on you. Seems like you really love her more than me. A NO can actually hurt me. Really. The way you reply her on the phone, really hurt me. I purposely ask her to text you when I''m with her. You said you wanted to last with me, you said you wanted to married me and have kids with me. You promised. Yet you lied. Every of the promise you made. I remember. You know this gonna happen, why would you ask me for patch to hurt me again? Why? Why I trust you? WHY. I'm strong the outside, but to be frank not the outside.Whenever your names appears on my msn, fb, phone and everywhere in my mind, those memories. I really cried like a bitch. I ever wonder if you miss me like I do? I ever wonder is your girl treating you good like I do? I ever wonder do you check my profile for the zillion times like I do? Do you ever click on my screen name and type how you feel and erase it all? Do you ever felt jealous when I was with other guy at plaza? Do you ever think back bout our past while you're lying on your bed? Do you ever tried to provoke me by using other girls to make me jealous like I do? Do you ever love me as much as I do? I ever say I won't look back, but I can't believe that I still want you. Do you ever wanted to know all the answer? Okay, I shall answer you honestly.. everything.. I lied to everyone even myself. I told myself I don't love you anymore, but... it's just a lie. I texted, go out and even get attached by this man is provoking you.  I said I won't look back I was angry by your broken promises. I said I will delete your every single of our picture I was pissed, yet I didn't. I said I ask you to burn away the jacket, because I was mad. Sometimes I would lie down on my bed alone and remember the old times. I laugh at myself with a ridiculous smile. Because of tear, ruin everything. You said those tears and promises I made was a lie, yes a lie, perhaps? The tears was just the eyedrop. You didn't even thought of my feeling, never. 5months is a lie? No matter, it seems  that I'm really the third party for destroying you and your girlfriend, because I know I will never get you back..     Last long :)